It's Complicated
by Nerdcolonist
Summary: Summary: Their relationship has secrets and it's not exactly exclusive. Clary and Alec have done so well hiding it from their family, excluding Izzy, but what happens when Jace finds out and he suddenly can't keep his hands off Clary or her out of his mind? JaceXClary ClaryXAlec AlecXMagnus
1. Chapter 1

Some information fist:

1. This is my first fanfic and I have absolutely no idea why I wrote it and why it's kinda well, slutty.

2. I have no real idea how this stuff works, so here it is

3. It does have mature content and you should only read it if you feel up for some untouchable content

Alexander Lightwood is my boyfriend. I laugh to myself. We have been dating for the past three years. Our relationship is not monogamous. I know it, he knows it, and see knows it. They do not know it. Alec is a man anyone would want in their bed, but only if they were gay or if they were me. Alec and I had started going over roughly three years ago and it didn't take long to for us to fall in 'love.' I remember one day waking up and realizing that I love Alec, but not in the sweaty-palm, unreasonably giddy, and stupidly nervous love. He feels the same way. Neither one of us could function without the other though, we had tried and two years of being dependent on one another had made it impossible to function with the other there like some sort of security blanket. Because of this we decided to stay together but have an open relationship. I knew about this, he knew about this, and his sister (my best friend) knew about it. His parents didn't know about it. Neither did mine. It was not something they needed to know. Alec is gay, except with me. Odd, I know but him being gay doesn't stop us from hopping in bed every once in a while nor does it stop the tender caresses of his. It's just there and I don't have a problem with it. Things were going great, we were still together but saw other people on the side doing normal couply stuff like dates and everything, until a few nights ago. We were invited by his parents, Robert and Maryse Lightwood, to dinner with his sister Isabelle, his younger brother Max, and his adopted brother Jace.

We went to the restaurant that night, Alec looking stunning in a suit as always while I wore a simple but elegant gold dress, to eat. Everything was going smoothly and Alec began trailing his fingers up and down my thigh beneath the table and I couldn't help but want to jump him there when he smiles at me, but I see Jace's golden eyes flash down to Alec's hands and his expression suddenly morphs into something so emotional. Jace rarely showed such blatant emotions but when he did it was beautiful but startling. He looked jealous but I quickly shrugged it off and returned my attention to Maryse. She was going on about something that happened at her job earlier.

"You just wouldn't believe it. All of a sudden he dropped down on one knee and asked her to marry him. It was one of the most romantic things I have ever seen." She seemed to be swooning at the memory. I'm not the biggest fan of Maryse and Alec doesn't blame me. I'm glad he doesn't, it would make me feel worse.

"You know, Robert and I were just talking about when Alec here is going to pop the question to you." The world stopped moving and I share a quick glance with Alec. That one look conveys so many things I know what to do. I give a laugh and clutch onto his arm.

"You know, I have absolutely no idea if or when he'd ask but I don't think we need rings to proclaim our love." Alec smiles and brushes his lips against mine, a small spark courses through me and I realize how much I like kissing Alec. He says something to his parents, agreeing with me, but all I see is another flash of emotion from the usually void Jace. Anger this time.

"Clary. You don't think they suspect anything do you?" Alec asked, his breath warm against me ear. I curl up closer to him, shaking my head.

"No, I don't. I think they would have dropped a larger hint than talking about marriage. We have been together for three years, I guess that's the next thing they see." I bury my head in the crook of his neck, feeling his arms encircle me.

"I guess you're right. What do you think about it though, marriage?" I stay silent for a moment letting my finger roam lazily across his toned chest before looking up into his startling blue eyes that contrast so greatly with my emerald green ones. He gazes down at me with a curious expression and I realize I should answer him.

"I'd be faltered to marry you, Alec but I still don't see how a ring does anything. If you asked, I would say yes." He seemed to soften at my words and is kissing me passionately in response. Alec being gay doesn't change anything about him, about us, it makes times like this, where the passion is still there between the two of us, all the more interesting.


	2. Chapter 2

Some Information First:

1. It's till pretty slutty, more so this chapter. Next one won't be tho.

POVs will change with people and I will show that

3.I will not ever write a full sex scene, you want a full sex scene, so somewhere else

4. Thank you for all the reviews, followings, and favorites. It makes me so happy and I can't wait to see what you think of this one.

Jace POV

I don't know why I agreed to go to that dinner. It was only torture to sit at the end of the table and watch him _touch _her like that when I wanted to so desperately. I felt my mask slip for just that moment and she happened to see. Clary. Even her name is beautiful. She looked at the most inconvenient of times when I let my emotions get the best of me. She looked so shocked I barely had time to register what Maryse was saying. The question? A felt a rock forming in my stomach when I realized they were talking about Alec and Clary getting married. I noticed the quick look they shared before responding the Maryse's not so subtle nudge. So many things seemed to pass between the two of them in that single moment I felt jealous once more, seeing his hand move to the inside of her thigh. I felt some relief when she pushed off the idea of marriage and Alec agreed. I lose my mask once more when Alec kisses her and fate seemed to be against me for Clary saw it again.

I know that I seem to fly through girls quicker than they can blink but I don't care about them nor do they mean something to me. No, that's a lie, they mean something; they are a symbol of what I can't have. I can't have her. I have never told anyone this nor do I plan to and I fear, yes, fear that I will take these thoughts to my grave and never once utter the words I so desperately want to share with her. I was going to ask her out a couple years ago, I had finally worked up the nerve to ask her. Nerve right? Me, the playboy that rules this town of countless bodies, had to work to ask a simple girl out. She wasn't even hot. That's what I like about her the most. She has a simple beauty that many seem to miss but it is the most amazing form of beauty I have ever seen. The simple beauty that contrasts so greatly with the beauty of someone like Izzy. Izzy is the wow beauty that stuns quite obviously, while Clary is stunning but in a different way. I remember going through those doors to ask her out when I see her, kissing Alec fiercely, never noticing me and my crushed heart a mere five feet away. I have tried and tried to fight my feelings for her, to drown them in the faces, no bodies, of others. It doesn't work but it'll have to do.

I didn't see either of them for a week, trying to drown the imagines of the two locked in a sweaty embrace with alcohol. A blonde hook up of mine is there and I don't hesitate to start kissing her.

"Jace." She whispers against my lips and I all but drag her out back, my drive for sex flying off the charts. She starts leading me to our usual spot, terrible sounding isn't it? There is already a couple locked in a tight embrace and I can't help but think one of those figures is familiar. They suddenly break away, gasping for breath and I can no longer feel nor do I care about, I think her name is Kaelie, because I was right, one of those two was someone I know quite well. Standing there, at the back of a sleazy bar was my adoptive brother: Alec cheating on Clary with some man. The man smiled at Alec when he realized they had an audience. Alec spun around, his eyes widening when he saw me. A flash of fury burned through me and I only remember stepping forward, my fist moving without my mind knowing what was happening. The sound of my fist against his face made a sharp sound in the alleyway.

I was suddenly on my back, the unknown man holding me down by my chest. I was yelling at Alec and he barely had the decency to look guilty. Not guilty that he cheated, but that he had been caught. I knew that look and it only made me angrier. Alec slumped down on a crate, his lip bleeding from where I hit him.

"Why, Alec? Why isn't Clary enough for you?" He looked at me, his blue eyes clouded with an emotion I couldn't recognize. He pulled out his phone. Who the hell was he calling?

"Clary, we have a problem. Meet me here okay?" He sounded resigned and I only wanted to hit him again.

"Get off me." I ordered the man sitting on my chest. He threw a quick look at Alec who only nodded defeated. All my anger seemed to vanish and I pulled myself up from the ground. "What the hell are you doing Alec?" There is an edge to my voice and I feel worry about how Clary will react. She seems so fragile sometimes, so little, and so breakable. This was going to break her.

Clary arrived quickly considering the time of night it was and I was shocked to see her dressed in an outfit Izzy must have picked out because it revealed much more skin than strictly necessary. Izzy was right behind her and I only got more confused, my head cocked to the side I watched them approach Alec, never once glancing at me. Clary knelt down in impossibly large heels, touching Alec's lip tenderly. I had never been as confused in my life than I was in that moment. She kissed him softly before standing up.

"What's the problem Alec?" Her voice slightly slurred and I realize that she must have been drinking.

"Take a look for yourself." He says, gesturing to me, wincing at the movement slightly.

"Jace?" I can't stop that feeling that runs through me when she says my name. "Oh Jace." Her tone changed and I suddenly feel like I have just stepped into the Twilight Zone. She looks at the man, clasping her hands in front of her body.

"Magnus, could you please leave us?" He nodded and walked away giving each of them a friendly hug in parting. Mangus? How the hell does she know this guy who was just kissing Alec? Why does she sound so clam about it? She walks toward me, grabbing my hands and pulling me down to sit next to her against a wall, Alec and Izzy opposite of us.

"Will you just explain what is going on here? Why is Alec kissing someone else? Why do you know who it was? Why are you okay with it?" I couldn't stop the questions from tumbling out of my mouth and I silently cursed myself for drinking so much. Clary put her hand on my arm and I started to calm down.

"Jace this is going to be a little hard to understand, but I am going to need you to listen to everything before you blow up." I grunted in acknowledgment, waiting to hear what the reason could possible be.

"As you know Alec and I are in a relationship that had lasted three years now," I moved to interrupt her but she places two fingers against my lips and continues. "What you don't know is that Alec and I have an agreement or sorts." I frowned, this was something I hadn't heard before.

"Alec and I have lost that love that makes you giddy, with sweaty palms, and so forth over the last three years. I do love him but not in that sense." My frown deepened.

"I am the same way." Alec added and I turned a cold stare at him.

"Because of that we don't have an exclusive relationship." Exclusive? What was she getting at? "We aren't a monogamous couple. We have agreed to stay together, be the couple and still do everything in that sense but we are free to see other people if we choose to. Hence why Alec was here with Magnus and I was..." She trailed off, a blush tinting her beautiful pale face. I was shocked to say the least.

"How long?" She's caught off guard by my sudden question but I am dying to know.

"About a year." Izzy says, speaking for the first time that night. So she knew. Of course she knew. Clary stood up and I couldn't help but admire her butt as she moved to help Alec up. Izzy caught me, her jaw slightly open and I could feel myself blushing. Clary gave Alec a quick peck before looking at me.

"I want to ask you to keep this quiet. Just because it is an open relationship doesn't mean Maryse or Robert need to know." Alec nodded in agreement, his arm slung around her waist. The little green monster reared it's head again. I told them I would keep my mouth shut and they seemed relieved. Alec left with Izzy, telling Clary he'd see her at home later that night. That monster reared it's heard again and had to look away. I gazed down at my hands, several thoughts running through my mind. Clary reached down, grabbing them in hers before forcing me to stand up. I looked at her and couldn't help but notice how beautiful she was under the stars. She smiled at me and I couldn't stop myself. I had to kiss her, at least once. I crushed my lips to hers heat building from deep within me. I expected her to push me away but instead she curled her fingers into my hair and kissed me back with an intensity I didn't know she was capable of. I pushed her up against the wall, my body flush with hers. She let out a small moan and I lost it. My hands roamed her body, feeling every dip and curve of her body against mine.

"Jace." She moaned softly as I began trailing my lips down her neck and onto her shoulder. She clutched at the back of my head, our legs twining. I leaned down further, my lips brushing against the top of her chest.

"Jace," God, I loved it when she said my name, her breath all hot and heavy.

"Mhmm?" I asked, never taking my lips off of her.

"As much," she started before giving another moan," as I would love to do this," another one. "I think we should." she was breathing hard and I smiled against her skin. "Stop." she finished breathless. I pulled back, unable to hide the hurt in my eyes. She placed her hand against my cheek and I unconsciously leaned into it. Her fingers were soft but calloused from years of holding a paint brush and pencil.

"Why?" I asked and it was her turn to look pained.

"Because I'm tipsy and I know you have been drinking. It wouldn't be right for us to do this, especially after everything that has happened tonight." She wasn't say no, just a reschedule because we weren't fully in control. She didn't mind that Alec was my adoptive brother for several years and that wasn't going to stop her. I could feel myself smiling as I pressed my forehead against hers, breathing hard.

"Are you absolutely sure?" I desperately wanted her to say no and take her right then and there, but she was in more control now than she had been previously.

"I'm sure, Jace." I nodded and pulled back, my body screaming in protest as it was no longer held against hers. She seemed to have a similar reaction. Clary stepped closer, her legs wobbling in her incredibly tall heels. She looked up at me and I could tell how badly she wanted to do this but refused to allow herself to. I leaned down and kissed her softly, her lips warm and I shuddered before pulling away because if I didn't I wouldn't stop.

"Goodnight, Clary." She gave me a small but sad smile before walking towards the street.

"Goodnight Jace."


	3. Chapter 3

Some Information First:

content is not quite as untouchable as before, but still kinda mature

2. I wanted to say a thank you to all the people who have left comments, followed, and favorite. It's all greatly appreciated and I'm glad someone likes it because I was really worried.

Clary POV

I wake up the next morning to hear Alec calling my name softly, his breath warm against my neck. "Clary. Clary, come it's time to get up." I only murmured something unintelligible, curling up closer to him, my back against his toned chest. "Come on Clary." I shake my head and he only laughs. I smile and finally opening my eyes, the sun bright and almost painful. A rush of guilt surges through me when I think about the previous night. Kissing Jace had caused a spark to ignite in my chest that hadn't been there is a long time, since I realized it wasn't there when I kissed Alec after a two years. It had taken all of my self control to stop and I regretted it but I wasn't ready to do that yet. I remember laying I bed wrapped in Alec's arms, wishes i was in Jace's. That guilt intensified and I rolled over, facing Alec. He smiled down at me and my heart fluttered a little bit. It hadn't done that in a while either. I kissed him slowly but intensely and he seemed surprised at first before returning the action, his thumb brushing my cheekbone softly. I broke away, gasping softly for breath only to see him smile at me again.

"Good morning, sweetheart." It had been a long time since he called me sweetheart and I loved it.

"Morning babe." I didn't know where this was coming from but it was nice. He seemed to think so too and I was filled with immense happiness.

"I like waking up like this." He added and I only nodded tucking my head into the hollow of his collarbone relishing in the warmth of his body. He chuckled, wrapping his arms around me tighter. "What would you like to do today, just you and me?" I smiled against his neck. It was always nice to spend the day with him, it was easy and comfortable and in all honesty I loved it.

"How about we start with some breakfast?" He agreed and got out of bed, leaving me in the wake of the sudden coldness. I squirmed, pulling the blankets around me tighter. He only laughed before kneeling down beside the bed, looking at me with his dancing blue eyes. I smiled as he reached froward to stroke my face, pushing my red hair out of the way. He was only wearing boxers and I could see the goosebumps raising across his skin.

"I'm not the only one who's cold." He only laughed before pulling me out of bed. I tried to fight him but it was no use, Alec's larger body and stronger muscles beat me. Instead I stopped suddenly and we toppled. We landed and Alec let out a grunt of surprise and slight pain. I smiled down from where I was on top of him, the blanket covering the two of us. He smiled back and I remembered why I loved him so much.

"You win." He told me softly before kissing me again. I sighed happily into it before pulling back.

"Breakfast?" He laughed at me and I stood up, taking the blanket with me. I couldn't help but smirk when I looked back down at him and he blushed a light pink before scrambling up and pulling me in for another intense kiss.

"We should do this more often." He murmured and I could only nod in agreement, my lips otherwise in use. He laughed, pulling me closer before pulling his head back, moving his lips away from mine. I frowned in protest and he only laughed before telling me to hurry up and change. I gave him a dark look moving towards the bathroom. This morning reminded me of times before our relationship was open and how much I craved them. Could this really work?

Alec took me to a little cafe around the corner, gripping my hand as we made our way down the street. I couldn't help but smile as he took my hand and I forgot about everything, everything except him. We sat down at a table in the back corner. A pretty waitress with blonde hair came over, smiling flirtatiously at Alec and I felt angry. Why couldn't she realize this was _my _boyfriend and we were having breakfast. Then I remembered our agreement and felt embarrassed and ashamed, but I would never tell Alec. It would only make things more complicated and I didn't want to mess up what was going so well. He ordered coffee for the two of us before reaching across the table and grabbing my hand, snapping me back to reality. He smiled at me and I couldn't help but smile back at him. The waitress threw me a dirty look before leaving. I remembered that we never flirted with other people in front of each other. We didn't want to impose extra stress and I was suddenly grateful. I would not have taken him flirting with her well right now. He moved his thumb in a circular pattern with a mischievous look in his eye.

"What are you thinking?" I asked, curious. He only shook his head and smiled. Normal Alec, planning something that he wouldn't tell anyone about till it was already in motion. I shook my head before looking down at my menu. His thumb stopped moving and I looked up. He was staring intently at his own menu when he started to ask me a question.

"Did you kiss Jace last night?" Alarm bells went off quietly in my head. We never talked about other people to each other, another one of our unspoken rules. I knew better than to lie, Alec either knew or he would find out. He always did.

"I did. But that's all I did." I watched him react, my eyes narrowed looking for some sort of tell sign. He seemed to relax, happy maybe even grateful, that all I did was kiss him. I didn't ask him why he cared. I had a feeling I already knew why. His thumb started up moving again and we didn't talk about it for the rest of breakfast. I was relieved.

The blonde waitress gave us the bill and I knew she had slipped her number in it. I pushed down my anger while he paid. She gave him a purposeful look before we headed out. Out of the corner of my eye I watched him crumple up the piece of paper she had slipped him before tossing it in the trash. I felt the corner of my lips turn up in a half smile. He caught it and gave me an amused glance before pulling me in for another kiss.

"You're the only girl for me, babe." I smiled but couldn't help the pain that pierced what could have been my heart. Maybe he meant he wanted just me, but I was only fooling myself with that. Alec was gay and I _was _the only girl for him. I pushed the feeling away before he could notice and waited for him to lead the way. He smiled at me before grabbing my hand in his again and leading the way.

Alec POV

I don't know what changed between last night and this morning but it was something and I loved it. I loved the feeling of Clary wrapped in my arms, her red hair tickling my chest. I hadn't felt this sort of love in a long time and I didn't want to let it go. We haven't had a morning that interesting or intense in so long I had forgotten what they were like. Especially the tumble to the floor, she had looked so beautiful, with her hair being a mess and her green eyes excited and warm. Just the thought of her made me, well excited too. I wanted to show her that I really did love her, that she really was someone of utmost importance. I saw that flash of annoyance and anger that crossed her face when the waitress smiled at me. Clary never got that angry before. I guess what Jace said the night before really got to me, 'Why isn't Clary enough for you?' I remember that anger he had and I felt...terrible. Really terrible because Clary was enough and I just wasn't realizing it. The thought of Jace made me angry too and I had to know. I had to know if he kissed her, if he slept with her. I _needed _to know. I asked and she stilled. I had broken one of our rules but I needed to know. Her word cut me like a double-edged sword, but it was only a kiss. I saw the hint of guilt pass her face when she said it and I could feel myself relaxing. Just a kiss and she felt bad about it. I was happy as terrible as it was to say.

I ignored the first time the waitress gave me her number, seeing Clary get angry again. The second time she slipped it into my hand, I crumpled it up and tossed it, seeing the corner of her mouth lift up in an elated smile. I was so happy at that moment, I couldn't express it.

"You're the only girl for me, babe." She smiled at me, but it was a sad smile. A smile that said, 'Yes, I know I'm the only girl for you, but not the only person.' I silently cursed myself for my wording and would have given anything to go back and fix it. I wanted to believe she was the _only _person for me. I wanted to try to be her only person again too. I stopped short, tugging on her hand, pulling her close to me. She had been worrying on her lip, it was starting to bleed. I couldn't help myself. I leaned down slowly brushing my lips against hers, using my tongue to wipe away to blood. She shivered beneath my touch and I kissed her passionately.

"I want to try." I told her, breathless when I finally pulled back. Her eyebrows furrowed and she looked confused.

"Try what?" She seemed hopeful.

"Us again. Just you and me." I had never been good with words or expressing my feelings but I had to this time. If I didn't, I could lose her and that wasn't something I was willing risk anymore.

"Really?" She was so hopeful, her eyes glittering with it and I was amazed at her beauty again.

"Without a doubt." I kissed her again slowly this time, letting everything sink it. It was just the two of us again and I was the happiest in that moment than I had been in a very long time.

More Info:

1. I am not the biggest fan of ClaryXAlec, I'm a totaly Clace fan but this just happened. I plan to have another one updated either tomorrow of the next day


	4. Chapter 4

Some more information:

1. Clace fans, please don't hate me. I already do that enough right now.

2. Because this can go more than one way, I shall start writing the alternate endings and they will be posted hopefully soon.

3. I want to give yet another thanks to everyone who chose to read this, review it, and follow/favorite it. It means a lot to me.

Jace POV

It had been almost three weeks since I had last seen Clary. Part of me worried she wouldn't remember that night but then I realized her eyes held much more clarity than someone who was drunk senseless. Her and Alec had both missed the last two family dinners. Maryse seemed thrilled that they were spending more time together but part of me was cold with dread. I asked Izzy if she knew anything about it but for once she was out of the loop too.

"I couldn't tell you anything. Clary has stood me up that last two bar dates we had saying she was 'busy'." She said angerly, putting quotation marks around busy. I was amused but worried. I hadn't seen Alec and neither had Magnus. Well, Magnus had recently talked to Alec and it didn't end well between the two of them. It only made me more curious and more apprehensive at what could possibly be happening between Clary and Alec.

I was walking through to park, thinking of none other than that little red head when I saw her out of the corner of my eye. I turned to look at her, a smile forming on my lips. I stopped short when I saw her laughing, running furiously with Alec chasing after her. They looked so playful with each other it almost broke me inside. They disappeared behind a tree and I had to follow them. I had to know what was actually happening between the two of them.

"Caught you." Alec said, breathlessly with an edge to his voice. Clary laughed and I peeked around the tree at the two of them. He had his arms around her tightly from behind, his eyes dark with desire as she was pressed tightly against him. I hugged the tree closer to watch them, my poorly put together heart crying in protest. She turned around in his arms, placing her hands against his chest. Her face was flushed and she looked so beautiful. She gazed up at Alec, biting her bottom lip and I could see Alec tighten with lust for her. I almost burst out from behind the tree but that would only make me look like I had been spying. I was, but they didn't need to know that.

"Yes, you did." She told him rather suggestively and I closed my eyes at the sound of her voice, wishing she was in my arms instead of his. I opened my eyes to see Alec trailing his lips from hers down to her collarbone. She had her eyes closed, holding onto his arms tightly. The two of them slowly lowered to the ground till he was sitting down with her on his lap. "Alec." The way she said his name pained me to the core.

"Yes, Clary?" His voice was filled with innocence that was only betrayed by the hungry look on his face. She captured his lips with hers but he stopped her suddenly.

"You really want this right?" He asked, earnestly. She nodded, biting her lip again. "What about Jace?" I stiffened at my name and everything in my being told me to walk away and not listen to what she was going to say but I couldn't. I couldn't leave without knowing where I stood with her.

"Jace doesn't matter right now. It's just you and me, remember? Like what we agreed on outside that dinner?" He looked relieved and began kissing her again. He slowly lowered her to the leave crested ground and I couldn't watch anymore. I started to turn around when I stepped on a leaf.

"What was that?" Alec asked and I silently cursed myself for stepping on a stupid leaf.

"Don't worry about it. It was probably some animal or just a kid." Clary said and I could hear them kissing again. I carefully walked away, my hopes and love crushed once more by Clary kissing Alec a mere five feet away, never noticing I was there.

The next night was another family dinner. I resisted the urge to blow it off so I got dressed and headed towards the restaurant. Everyone was already seated, Clary and Alec included. Maryse and Izzy released a squeal of happiness and Clary was beaming. God, she was so beautiful.

"You guys don't have to scream every time I enter a room." I say rather arrogantly. They both shot me a look and I sat down, unsure of what happened. "Seriously, why were you squealing?" They looked over at Clary and she turned to me, happiness etched on her features so plainly, I started to place my barriers up and slip my mask on.

"Alec asked me to marry him and I said yes." She said so happily holding her hand out to me where I could see that little diamond glittering happily under the light. That little rock represented everything I was beginning to hate about Alec.

"Congratulations. I am so happy for you." She nodded ecstatically before Alec pulled her in for another kiss.

"I love you, Clare Bear." He whispered. She blushed.

"I love you too, Alexander."


	5. Chapter 5

Some more information:

1. I lied. There is only one ending for this stuff because well, the ending says it all.

2. Thank you for all the reviews again. I am so happy.

3. I might add another after story, but only if you guys are going to read them, so please review.

Clary POV

Three months. That's all it took for hope to nest in my heart and then be brutally ripped from it. The last three months were amazing of all the time I had ever spent with Alec and I loved every moment of them. That is, until this morning. It happened so slowly. I remember opening the door to our apartment to find Alec there on the couch with another guy. I dropped my coffee, the cup hitting the ground with a hollow thud and the black liquid tumbled onto the ground in crushing black waves. Alec bolted away from the man and stared at me, jaw open and wide eyes. The man turned a cold gaze towards me, a smirk gracing his swollen lips while he kept a possessive hand on Alec's leg. Alec started to stand up and say something but I cut him off.

"Take if back." I said, my voice cracking as I slipped theh ring he gave me off my finger and threw it at him.

"Clary? Clary, wait!" He screamed at me but I couldn't stay there. I took off running, my heart pounding and my nerves rattling. I kept running and running, tears streaming down my face. I arrived at the Lightwood manner, where Izzy and the others lived and I reached for my key but I must have dropped it.

"Izzy?! Izzy, open up!" I yelled, pounding on the door growing weaker with each hit. "Please." I sobbed against the door. The weight suddenly disappeared beneath me and I fell forward, landing on my knees.

"Clary? Clary! Are you okay?" I heard Jace asking but I grasped shakily at the door frame before pushing past him.

"Izzy, where are you?!" I stumbled forward, trying to ignore everything, Alec kissing someone else, Jace standing there looking worried, my heart bloodied and broken. She wasn't there. I pushed my way further into the house, trying to find a room to hide in and cry even more. I didn't make it. I just collapsed against a wall in a random hallway. I held my hands against my face and sobbed loudly. I don't know how long I sat there sobbing but it was a moment before I noticed someone with their arms around me telling me it's going to be okay.

"Clary, it'll be okay. Just please stop crying, I hate seeing you cry." Jace said softly, rubbing his hand against my back in soothing circles. I shook my head and only cried harder. "Please don't cry anymore. Please, I hate seeing such a beautiful girl cry." I laughed bitterly and wiped at my face.

"I'm not beautiful." He shook his head.

"No you are beautiful. The most beautiful girl I have ever seen. That's one of the reasons why I love you." I hated that word. Absolutely hated that word.

"No. You shouldn't love me. I'm broken when it comes to love. I've been in love with someone who has been gay for the past two years. You should love someone better and who can love you in return." I couldn't break him like I was broken. It was not okay to do that to him and I couldn't push myself further on the love thing.

"Clary, you don't mean-" I didn't let him finish. I moved out of his arms, scrambling up the stairs to find a room to seek refuge in. I ignored whatever he called after me, tears coming up faster than I could wipe away.

Jace POV

Two days. It was two days since Clary had seen Alec kissing someone else. Since I had told her I loved her. She locked herself in a room upstairs and refused to talk to anyone but Izzy and Izzy wasn't coming back until tomorrow. She didn't come out to eat anything. I think she just lays there, crying her eyes out over what happened with Alec. Maryse tried to talk to her, like Robert but she refused to tell them anything besides saying the normal 'go away' like a teenager and 'ask Alec' but I guess that meant sense when Clary was like another kid to them since she was over here all the time when they were younger. She only answered to Max. It was like that little boy had some secret power we couldn't understand.

"Clary, are you okay?" Max asked his head against the door.

"I'm fine Max. Okay? I'm fine." Max seemed content with that and walked away. How does that kid do it? I pressed my head against the door to hear Clary chocking back a sob. Alec came by once but she wouldn't even say anything to him. I jiggled the door handle and it opened. I peeked my head in to find Clary laying on the floor, curled up in a ball her head tucked against her chest.

"Clary?" She only stared ahead, not bothering to acknowledge me. I laid down next to her, placing my hand against her back. "Clary will you please tell me what's wrong?" She only shook her head, tucking in closer on herself. I sighed, pulling her towards me till she rested against my chest.

"Please Clary, it might help you." She looked up at me, her big green eyes filled with such hurt and pain.

"Alec cheated on me." She whispered.

"But you guys were in an open relationship." She shook her head.

"No we weren't. Three months ago we decided to try again, just him and me. It was great and I was actually hopeful that it would work. Then Alec proposed and it was the happiest moment in my life. Then he was there with someone else in the apartment. I feel so stupid. I knew Alec was gay but he said he loved me and I believed him. I felt hopeful for once and it crushed me when I saw the two of them." I was shocked. Alec let her walk away.

"I am so sorry Clary." I wrapped my arms around her tightly for a hug and she didn't cry so I took if for a sign of good hope. "Clary, it'll be okay." She looked so crushed for a moment but she didn't cry again. She pressed her head against my chest.

"Thank you." She whispered before her eyelids drooped and she fell asleep, her head tucked into the hollow below my chin. I loved her and I would do everything I could to help her mend. Clary wasn't broken, she was just hopeful and sometimes hope was the worst of them all. I lifted her up carefully, before sitting her down on a bed covering her up. She was sleeping and it wasn't interrupted by the regular sobs I heard through the walls.

"Alec. Her door's open but she is asleep right now. I don't think she's gonna want to talk to you right now though." Alec was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. It looked like he hadn't slept in days either. He was holding Clary's engagement ring between his fingers. He nodded before giving me a narrowed look.

"How did you get in her room?" He asked. I stared at him in disbelief.

"Max got her to talk and I jiggled the door handle till I got inside the room. She was curled up on the floor, sobbing her eyes out. I got her to talk and she finally fell asleep. I only have to ask, why would you kiss someone else when you had the perfect girl in the perfect relationship? Why would you throw that away? Clary was perfect, even for a gay man!" I screamed the last part at him. He jumped up and started to yell at me but I didn't hear it. I punched him. He deserved it.

"Don't say you didn't deserve it. When Clary wakes up, you tell her sorry and you leave her alone. You shouldn't put her through that anymore. It isn't fair to her." He only nodded before falling back into his seat, defeated.

"You do deserve it." A sleepy voice said from behind me. I jumped and looked over to see Clary. Alec started to get back up but she shook her head. "Don't Alexander." I jumped again. She only called him Alexander when she was angry or happy and she wasn't happy right now.

"I don't care about why you did it, but you did it. There is no forgiving you for it, not after we agreed to be just you and me again." He nodded, knowing there was nothing he could really say.

"I love you Clary. I am really sorry about what happened. There is nothing I can do to fix this but I know that I am not the one for you. In truth I never really was." He said, standing up. He pressed the ring into her hand, saying sorry again before leaving. Clary looked down at it before tucking it into her pocket.

"Thank you Jace." She told me. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her in for a hug.

"I can't say I love you Jace, or that I ever could but I'd be willing to try one day. Just give me a minute, okay?"I smiled, holding her close. This was just another reschedule and I know that this time she would come back, because I wouldn't let her get away.


End file.
